Three days ago, someone told me that I should be more assertive. Then the next day, someone shared at work that to become a leader, one should be assertive – not aggressive nor passive. Then while shopping for a book in Virgin, this book showed itself to me! If it had a voice it said, “Pick me! Pick me!” What an assertive book! But then I didn’t buy it. Being assertive is learning to say “No!” Wow! Am I learning to be more assertive already? 
Ok, so what does it mean to be assertive? I have always tried to be the nice person, courteous and sensitive to other’s feelings. But I must confess that sometimes being too nice gets me into trouble. I don’t get what I want or what I deserve and most of the time people take advantage of my amiability. Shame on them! But that is how the world we live in works. Wolves prowl among us waiting to devour little sheep like me. Though let me explain that assertiveness doesn’t mean being rude or aggressive. It is the fine line between being nice and being aggressive. It is expressing yourself without hurting other’s feelings or stepping on someone else’s rights. So assertiveness is not as easy as I thought but with practice, we will all get to learn to be one.
Here are notes to myself to start with:
- Learn to say “No”
- Express what you think especially if you think you have a point in a respectful but confident way
- Manage your anger. Mean words, violence and silence are not ways to resolve an issue
Wolves beware! You might stumble on lions in sheep’s clothing. No guts, no glory!
